First off, I apologize for not writing last week. I have made it my goal to write two posts a week, but between working all week and life, there just wasn't the time. We spent Saturday with my Mom's side of the family who were celebrating Thanksgiving. There were bows (as in I felt like Katniss Everdeen shooting deer to bring home for food... except it was a crossbow which she wouldn't have used... and the deer was not exactly real), shotguns, incredible food, brilliant company, and a very warm bonfire.
Today is my one day off (I subbed yesterday and am subbing the next three days -- insert happy dance), so I figured I had better write!
Yesterday I was in a grade five class while teaching some grade six Social Studies. The kids were a hoot and remembered me from a brief stint I had in their class last week. I was definitely exhausted by the end of it (I'm used to high schoolers who are dopey and quiet on Monday afternoons... not grade six kids who I could swear were injected with sugar right before I entered the classroom) :) I'm back in those classes tomorrow, and then Thursday and Friday see me at the high school.
I'm definitely getting some work, which is a great feeling! Although my house (and especially my cat), don't seem to like that I'm not home as often. I don't think our cat trusts me anymore. He sees that I'm home but won't come cuddle unless I'm on the phone (apparently that signifies I'm staying put). Or maybe he's upset because we locked him out of the room last night. We try to let him come on the bed. But he has this somewhat annoying habit of pawing at the wardrobe when he thinks it is time for husband and I to get up and play with him. Last night he started this pawing as soon as we turned the lights out. He was out of the room and the door was closed after that!
I went for a run in the rain today, which I always find invigorating. Thought it wasn't my best run (working means I don't run as regularly), it was good to get out. And I was listening to a podcast by Matt Chandler that had to do what it means to be made in the image of God. If we are His image bearers on earth, what does that require of us?
It was an interesting start, but I still have about twenty minutes to go in the sermon and haven't found my thoughts formulated around it enough to write anything. So while I wait for what I'm baking in the oven (husband's birthday is tomorrow and so dessert must be made today), I will tell you what is on my mind.
I'm thinking about pain. Hardship. Suffering.
About feeling as though you were suffocating in your circumstances.
About the fact that sometimes it seems like there is not answer to why we experience what we experience.
How do you comfort someone who is aching? Who is broken? What do you say when you cannot begin to understand the depth of what they are feeling?
My cousin was a guest blogger (on a different blog) this past week. And I want to share with you the link for what she wrote. Because sometimes we are in pain and if we are completely honest we can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Hope becomes myth. We can read our Bible and pray, but it doesn't always help. We don't turn our back on God, we understand that He is God and His ways are higher than our own, but that doesn't stop us from wanting to yell and scream. From wanting to fall at His feet and beg for an answer as to why we have to go through what we go through. And then it feels like we are met with silence.
How do we keep on going? How do we bring our pain to God? How do we live with our pain, without succumbing to it?
I cannot pretend to understand what my cousin is going through. Or what other I know have experienced when the teachers were on strike in BC and there were no paycheques coming through. Or what the beautiful, talented, incredible women I know are feeling right now when it seems like they will be single forever.
I know there is Hope. And I know there is Peace. But I also know there are times when it seems like life becomes too much. Where we are unable to see hints of the light.
And I want those people in my life who are experiencing that to know that I see them. That I am humbled by the strength and resilience they have shown. That even though they may not be able to see God right now, I see Him in them.
Thank you.
This is the link to what my cousin wrote:
http://themuckoflife.blogspot.ca/2014/09/guest-post-view-from-other-side-of.html?spref=fb
Thank you for seeing us. And thank you for sharing your life here. It is almost as good as a visit (with the Vissus) on a rainy afternoon over tea.
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